Four Months

Four months has now passed since we lost him. It might as well be four years, I feel like it's been a lifetime since I last held him. Somedays are better than others, but everyday is still a struggle. On Sunday, Nathan will be leaving for seven months. I'm preparing myself for the most difficult seven months of my life, without my husband and without my son.
We spent this last weekend packing, putting all our things in storage and getting ready for him to leave. While Nathan is gone, I'm going to be living with a friend and starting school, hopefully a combination of the two will help me remain sane. I'm hoping time will fly quickly and before I know it, Nathan will be home again.
About two months ago, I had stumbled upon a lady's blog...she lives in Australia and has started a business writing names in the sand for children that have passed. I put our Kyler on the waiting list and she emailed me on Saturday and said she had finally written his name! I was so excited to see what colors he had chosen for us. It gave me goosebumps, it's the most beautiful photo I have ever seen :)

"At the end of the day, all the children of Heaven come together to paint the colours of the sunset." Carly Marie Dudley

Mommy and Daddy miss you SO much, Kyler. Never a day goes by that we don't think of you and wonder how different our lives would be if you were here. You are so incredibly loved and you will forever be our baby. I hope someone special is tucking you in every night, climb up on God's lap and wait for Mommy and Daddy to be with you again.
We love you so very much.